DUE TO SUPPLY ISSUES

The recipe said keep them crispy for hours
By draining your fritters on a few paper towels
That was a good hint so I went to buy some
Paper towels for crisp fritters will please everyone

The shelves in the supermarket were bare
Everywhere that I searched paper towels were not there
DUE TO SUPPLY ISSUES was displayed on big signs
In aisle after aisle they were there many times

First it was toilet rolls that we all hoarded
Then flour and rice until Covid got sorted
These days it’s the weather and wages and war
Causing bare shelves and basic food prices to soar

So now? What to do? shoppers asked in despair
As we stood in the aisle with our stares and our glares
A visit to customer service was next
And the answer at this point was even more vexed

‘DUE TO SUPPLY ISSUES we can’t tell you when
Paper towels will appear in our aisles again
Just replace paper towels with our great toilet rolls
We’ve got lots of them now it’s a sight to behold.’

Now you may be correct toilet paper might do
But I can’t bring myself to buy what we use for a poo
The paper towel shortage went on for 5 weeks
I tried fritters without draining them which were soggy heaps

Last week I went back to replenish supplies
DUE TO SUPPLY ISSUES had grown in size
There were no eggs at all due to the recent new law
That bans battery cages which I greatly applaud

I never bought that type of egg anyway
But no other egg options were there on display
No eggs no fresh fruits no essentials for baking
But the paper towel shelves were stacked high for the taking

When I finally managed to buy paper towels
Eggless fritters were googled then made within hours
The DUE TO SUPPLY ISSUES caused no more distress
And the fritters became a resounding success